mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
