Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
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