I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
