but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
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