the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
