she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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