well you can't waste a boner
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
