maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
