I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
