do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize