new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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