Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
it hurts more in the daytime
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm always down for nudity.
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