I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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