Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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