I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
