It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
