worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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