i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I wish i was in the wii world.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
