Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
