I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
