I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
