It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
