so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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