yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize