My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Is Oprah even human
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
