last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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