i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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