it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
