I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Bring me that man meat
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Randomize
