lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
