Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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