just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Dignity is for republicans.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize