Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
