I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
