Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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