hotel room ftw
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
