life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Alive.
So much puke
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
