i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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