He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
