ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I checked into jail on foursquare
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
