she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
God I need to hump something, right now.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
