I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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