if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
