At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
