I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
