too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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