sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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