"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
