so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
