I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize